Our team was on a mission. Go to the markets to buy things to sell back in the states to make money for Asha House. He spoke, “just rest in Me.” So I said, okay, whatever that looks like I'm following your lead. I remember the prayer of my heart that day was, “Lord, show me a way to faith-fully respond to the needs I see,” and I thought I had meant the needs of Asha. And indeed He is providing ways for me to answer that need faithfully now that I am home and He's been opening doors I never could have expected. But then, on that day, He also showed me that He is the one who works righteousness for the oppressed (Ps. 103:6) not me, not my weak attempts at compassion, just Him the one true Living God!)
We were walking the streets to take a Metro from Karl Bagh to Janak Puri a market with lots of shopping and many tourists. As we walked by there was a man sitting and begging. This is not at all uncommon in places like the metro or high-traffic areas, especially where more people will be. What pulled at my heart and drew me close to this man was the heart of Jesus. He was covered in what looked like a thick coat of bubbling flesh. It was his own skin. It was only having his biggest shame on display that he could perhaps tempt some pity out of some to earn enough to subsist.
And His instant reaction was to reach out and be as near to this man as He could. I went with Him and took this mans hands into mine. I looked into his eyes and saw Him staring back at me. I wished so much in that moment that I could speak more Hindi but also was grateful that I didn't because words might have cheapened the moment. So I just looked and loved and gripped his hand and tried to communicate that there was no where I'd rather be in that moment. There's no one I'd rather sit with. It was only a minute. But it felt like time stood still. (for the Lord, to whom a day is a thousand years and a thousand years but a day, I do not think that a minute on earth can always be measured the same. More value and depth was contained in that moment than perhaps any and all others in my life put together)
Our group was going on and so Britt and I went to leave the scene of grace to catch up with them. As I began to pull away, this man pulled back on my hand and pointed to his begging bowl. It broke my heart that whatever I have to give is just paper. It means nothing. And I didn't want to be just another person who gave a guilt-offering. I wanted to know this man. I wanted to communicate his worth because God knew him before time began and saw his pain, and wept with him in his affliction. I squeezed his hand and we left.
I could never forget that. I had my world shaken, His grace and love is the undoing of our hearts. Undoing all the lies of fear and failure. And then His love fills us with freedom. Freed to love. It was amazing because though I felt rooted to the spot and how could I continue? He opened the floodgates of my heart to continue in love for the whole day. I had so many beautiful unexpected interactions that day. As I was walking around later that day reflecting still on the event of the morning, I head Him say, “As unto me,” meaning that whatever I do, do it as unto Him, and whatever I did in love I was doing as unto Him.
The next day I knew we would be passing the same spot on the metro. I wanted to give this man I saw yesterday something. Not money, something meaningful and something beautiful. Because our God is a God of extravagance and lavishes His good gifts on His children. I wish so much that I could guarantee that this man would not be in need again after a meal. I brought a scarf with me, it's my favorite scarf, blue with gold threads and decided before we left the house I was giving it to my friend. It just came in a picture, an impression so strong to me that I just felt like it already belonged to him. That is how Jesus works though, already he has made us new and already He has seen it through, it's just stepping where He's walked an following the hem of His robe.
Amazingly God provided an opportunity where part of our team was stopping at the ATM so Britt and I went to sit a while with our friend. We came near and his face lit up with recognition! He remembered us! What a gift that was to me. So we sat, and I took his hand and we smiled and said a few things, I don't remember much of what was said. It wasn't important. I spoke the name of Jesus at some point, saying “Issu Massi” and pointed up to the sky and said, “loves you, so much,” and pointed to my heart and his heart. I gave him the scarf and he looked at me as if to say, “No, are you sure?” and I nodded insistently and pointed to him meaning, “it's yours! It already is yours and always was.” And he smiled. And I saw for the first time in his eyes a kindling, a light and a flame..... there was Hope. I'm not talking hope that the world means, as in this may or may not happen. I am talking the biblical hope, which means most nearly, Assurance. Peace poured out as deep called out to deep. My eyes filled with tears. And he looked sorry to see me cry! How can this be?! My heart was breaking for his life, and the thought that when, if ever had someone held his hand?! How can this man, who has known only the sting of rejection and the anguish of apathy look on me with compassion?
Grace.
Jesus.
it's all your Grace.
His eyes were so sweet. His smile so dear. Beautiful. He was beautiful. There was strength in him. We asked him his name, and it was a very long name and I'm sorry I can't remember what it was.
It was a quite a while before I became aware of our surroundings. It seemed that a crowd had been gathering for some time, I only just now noticed that we were creating something of a scene. There were groups of people stopping and staring and talking and pointing. Some curious, some baffled, some bewildered, others with cruelty or disgust. Many had smirks on their faces. Several police men with sticks tried to get the crowd to disperse... it was to no avail. The crowd grew and grew. And we were still rooted to the spot, the kingdom so present in our midst. I remember at some point one man said to me, “Excuse me miss, but I must tell you not to touch this man. He has a skin disease and it is very contagious and he is unclean so you really need to go,” And my heart broke for the fear in his voice and I pitied how he could not understand this grace or this great love. Jesus said, “you are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you,” and I believe him when He says, “what comes out of a man's mouth is what makes him unclean.” So I turned to this man, still holding the hand of my friend and said something to the effect of “Sir, my God is much bigger than anything, any sickness or any disease. Jesus is my Lord and He is protecting me, and if that is true, what you say is true, then it is already done and I am here so, I will stay. He has already taken care of it. ” I told our friend that he was my friend. That is one phrase I am so grateful to know in Hindi, “mira doste,” (“my friend”).
I am forever changed because of the way He showed himself, mighty and mighty to save.
I thought of how I saw the face of God in all of this....He covers us with His grace, it drapes over us and He binds up our broken hearts. He is our advocate and stands firm with us whomever so tries to get in the way of His love. And I thought of the scene we caused... isn't that just like the Kingdom? To make people stop and stare and wonder, what grace is this that we would kneel at the feet of a beggar?
The view with grace is so beautiful. Things are their true hue. He makes all things beautiful....
and we saw a king and we saw the face of The King of Kings.
Never forget, He says. You were made free to love by the perfect sacrifice I paid once and for all. And how could I ever forget this man, this day, or this Grace? He says, never forget and means His child, this man, my friend. He says never forget what I did (on the Cross), because only I could, and I dared. Never forget that my kingdom is coming and indeed is now come.
It is the Revolution of Love. And it looks like time standing still on the street corner, where we three sat at the foot of the throne and were untouched by the authorities and law, and prowling of the enemy , for those who spoke against were silenced by the strength of grace. This grace that is unashamed, unapologetic and unphased.
For Love is disarming to those who do not understand that it is a law unto itself... it IS for the sake of itself. He is for the sake of Himself. He loves because He is love that first loved us and is faithful.
My Jesus, how beautiful you are!
"The Message of the cross is foolishness to those
who are headed for destruction. But to we who are
being saved it is the very power of God."
1 Corinthians 1:18
